2019 was probably the most exciting year in my life so far. Both in personal and professional aspect.
I entered the year pregnant and I spent the first months of the year mentally preparing myself for a big life change. My life was still relatively easy and I am happy I made the best of this period and I spoiled myself every possible way.
Once you become a mother, there is far less time for your own wants and needs, so please don’t miss out on this last opportunity!
In the spring we became a family of three and our home has never been the same since.The second and third quarter of the year were devoted to getting used to motherhood. A very exciting and at the same time a very challenging period.
Unfortunately, there is no school for parents, you are supposed to learn by doing. The biggest lesson I learned during the past 8 months was that it’s ok to feel ignorant. It’s ok to not know how to dress your baby, how to introduce solid foods and basically to feel like you are playing roulette all the time.
Motherhood was new to me and it is often said that every child is different. This unique combination makes the experience of each mother uncomparable. This means that even though you might not know what to do in a certain situation, no one else could know better than you do. I am still trying to make peace with this thought as it saves me quite some headaches when I start doubting myself.
Taking up a new professional challenge
When I thought that my life couldn’t get any more complicated I was approached with a new job opportunity. I wouldn’t have been myself if I didn’t accept the challenge. When my life gets a little predictable and comfortable I tend to find myself a new challenge. Or a new challenge finds me 🙂
But this time it was different. Suddenly I was faced with the most difficult dilemma in my life so far: to continue working three days, so I could spend most of my time with our daughter or to pursue a new career challenge and go back to work full time.
There is a certain expectation from society that once women become mothers, they should give up their own dreams for the sake of their children. I suppose some of you might judge me for sending my daughter to daycare for five days a week since she was six months old. And I will lie if I say it’s not challenging and I don’t feel guilty at times.
I am grateful to my husband who fully supports me in pursuing my ambition and takes over my responsibilities as a mother while I am travelling. It is a painful experience to be away as a mother, especially when I was on a different continent while my daughter was sick and teething.
Lesson learned: you cannot have it all and be perfect in all your roles all the time – there will be days when you will need to make sacrifices and at least in my world feeling guilty about it is part of the game.
Dealing with loss
This year has not only been positive.
We gained one family member but we lost another. My grandfather passed away and all of us are still coping with the loss. Especially now at the end of the year when the family gets together around the table but nothing feels the same.
Unfortunately, there is no pill that you can swallow to ease this pain. I hope people are right that time will heal and after all that’s the way life is: sweet and bitter at the same time.
How about you?
As you can see 2019 was a hell of a year for me and I raise a glass to its end.
How about you?
What challenges did you face during the past year? What lessons did you learn?
What are you proud of? What are you grateful for?
I believe that the purpose of our life is to move in the direction of our dreams, to celebrate our successes, to learn from our mistakes, to cherish our loved ones, to give back to society and by doing so to acquire valuable lessons and wisdom which we can pass on to further generations.
Why not take some time to look back and reflect on the ups and downs you experienced this year?
Just don’t dwell on the past for too long. Life goes on and each new day brings new opportunities.
Take the wisdom and experience from this year and let 2020 be even happier, healthier and more fulfilling for you, your family and friends!